Porn, Pictures And Poetry
One model’s quest to change how you view erotica and how it can empower women to connect with their truest selves
Smiling brightly she hops into my car, effervescent as ever. Despite suffering from a recent bout of insomnia, she’s her usual excitable self. I’ve known Kerry for around 9 years, so we immediately complain about our aches and pains for a couple of miles before parking and settling in for a late breakfast in a quiet corner of a local pub. We huddle with our backs to the rest of the clientele and order our food.
“We are going to talk about adult stuff. It’s best we’re out of earshot.”
Kerry is a freelance model, creative and erotica innovatory. Erotica, she says, is often misunderstood. She is keen for me to recognise there is a huge difference between adult work and the kind of work she does.
No, this isn't porn. This is a type of poetry.
“It’s about the mood of the shoot. I like there to be an emotional feeling or reason behind the picture, not just someone lying in front of the camera trying to be sexy.”
When I ask her how far she would go for a picture, she is adamant that she would not engage in anything crude in its depiction of her form. She does not do what is known in the industry as ‘adult’ work.
Yes, some of the photos she shows me are nude, but they clearly are a celebration of the shape and lines of a woman's body. These don't feel in any way pornographic.
They’re almost rhapsodic. They’re art.
Modern-Day Modelling
She works from the popular site PurplePort, a networking platform for models and photographers and has done for almost a decade.
I ask her about how she makes her money, and she describes that she will set up a ‘tour’ which consists of her hiring studios, equipment, lighting and themes where she will pick out clothing, and props. She will invite photographers, and hobbyists to book slots to capture her image, taking a fee for each session on offer.
A tour consists of numerous venues in a particular area and will often take her away from home, but for Kerry, it’s worth it. Three long days of shooting will pay handsomely as she commands a higher rate of pay with her almost decade of experience.
Her niche is seeking out adventure and she has a particular knack for finding spots of natural beauty. Outdoor shoots are popular and it’s the place where she best uses her artistic licence.
“I get booked for my sense of adventure, I am willing to climb trees or scale a rock face to get the best shot. I feel the most alive when I’m under a freezing cold waterfall in the middle of nowhere. This is no 9–5 desk job.”
A Small World With Big Possibilities
When I enquire about how safe she feels on the shoots, she confidently describes how the site she works from offers reviews from other models. Photographers with bad reviews are banned from the site. This is a serious business and there is zero tolerance.
But I’m also surprised to hear that since the pandemic she can work electronically meaning she is often alone in a studio. Remote shooting has taken off and it has opened up a plethora of new opportunities.
“A photographer can shoot from anywhere in the world, they connect from the wifi to control the camera and talk to me through Zoom.
This has opened up the possibility to work with photographers from all over the world.”
This is a market that serves to bring out the best in creatives in all their capacities. While there are always going to be people that are going to try and take advantage, Kerry says that the system is set up so that all parties are cared for and kept safe.
“Accountability and communication come first. Establish your boundaries and then you’re free to make something beautiful.”
More Than Modelling
When I met Kerry almost a decade ago, she was just beginning her career in erotica. She was exhilarated and in complete control of the vision, she was carrying in her mind.
She describes to me how she feels like an actor. Forming characters, escaping into a new world for those short hours cumulating in dramatically beautiful images she can keep forever.
A portfolio of fantasy and feeling.
“I practised alone in front of the mirror, but I knew to be a truly good model I had to bring something more. I had to somehow radiate the feeling inside my soul and the camera would then see it in my eyes.”
Connecting To Self
The other unique thing to know about this incredibly dynamic woman is that her motivation stems from a deep desire to learn how to love herself.
She was once double the weight she is today.
“I ate on my feelings but realised I had to face myself. I dropped over half my weight but needed to see what other people saw in me. Creative erotica modelling became a way to connect with myself.”
In the last two years, she has stepped back from being in front of the lens and has picked up a camera. Knowing how good it can make someone feel if they let go and be free enough to be captured in those fleeting moments, has meant she has pushed herself to try something new so others have the opportunity to feel the same way.
It’s hard work, she knows what it takes but she also knows that the rewards are high.
“It’s the job that brings out the best in me and I want to extend this feeling to other women.”
Woman To Woman
Beyond curating such a daring self-styled career, Kerry now wants to bring what she gets out of being an erotica model to others.
Her new venture ‘Warrior Goddess’ is a collaboration with fellow model Rose Magdalene and photographer Owen Lloyd. It’s an opportunity for the everyday woman to tap into and showcase their inner strength and beauty. A chance for women to be their own heroin for the day.
This is no ordinary photo shoot. It’s an experience.
“Warrior Goddess is a workshop for everyone. Any size, any shape and with any reason to want to find their innermost voice and capture it on film.”
Outfits, makeup and props. Experienced models to mentor and encourage. Photographers bring fire and light. A promise of images that will last forever.
It heralds to be a truly unique way to empower women to see themselves in the same way that she came to see herself.
Erotica As Your Own Power
Erotica can clearly be sexy. But it is in no way pornographic. Its ability to induce fantasy through artistic imagery, make-believe and storytelling is what makes it so uniquely thrilling and beautiful.
It can be a story to one's self, yet some say that regardless of intent, erotica is inherently opposed to female empowerment because it feeds the male gaze.
I would disagree.
Erotica is a powerful way for a woman to be free. To be captured in the way she feels beautiful, for no one other than herself. It’s a choice that doesn't extend any further than that.
That's the power of this kind of work. You choose.
“I want a woman to be their own brand of beauty, to feel good about themselves so they can be a better person for the people that matter in their lives. That’s what this is about. Being a better human.”
To follow Kerry’s Instagram click here
Watch my award-winning short documentary here and connect with me via Twitter, Instagram. Join Medium via my link so you can read all my content at any time.
Read Confessions Of A Sex Therapist: Part #2 here
Gioia is a freelance journalist and documentary maker based in Merseyside. You can visit her work on Muckrack.
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